Having just spent a lovely weekend with Dame Judi and Uncle not so Fatty I thought I would write a soppy post for all you Cockney-Slitty-eyed-Jowel mongers!
I just wanted to say I am so glad I have you guys as family, as the other side of my family are a complete and utter waste of space. A bunch of posh idiots who don't seem to appreciate the true meaning of family! It's a long story and very dull so I won't bore all you lovely people with it! But their tendency to sweep things under the carpet is really bringing out the Grace blood in me and I just want to sit them all in a room and tell each and every one of them what everyone else is saying behind their ignorant, blind backs! Rrrrrr! Any ideas as to how to bring out all the unspoken tensions between them all?! Because otherwise, I swear I will tell them where to shove their retarded posh wankerness! So far I have been told to keep my mouth shut and let it lie, but that's what they're all doing and I don't agree with it! I have never been one to keep schtoum! Answers on a postcard please!
'Polish Pussy Press'Gud'day mates, just a quick note to say good luck and have a smashingly wonderful time in Poland to my big brother, Chrissy. Im sure mumsy has equiped you with more hats, gloves and coats than you could wrap a small Norwegian family in.
Love and love, Tommy x
